I'm already Gone

Calum backed out, he just left for no apparent reason. So I cancelled everything in BC. I'm not going alone. The problem is that I've made so many plans, and my heart and soul is already there, someplace warm, and my body is just left here to freeze. I don't have it in me for more disappointment, not yet. So for now I'm just waiting, not letting my mind wander to my predicament. Eventually I'll figure out something, but for now I'll just wait.

Open Your Eyes

Check out the website meat.org

PLEASE!!!

It will change your life!

My Amazing Sister=D

Today I think I'll write about my wonderful little sister, Rowenna. I just feel very lucky to have her around. For those of you who don't know, her new years resolution was to go vegetarian, and she's stuck to it for almost a month already. She is also pretty much avoiding dairy, and she hates eggs so she's mostly vegan=D I'm so proud and happy.

The other day Rowenna started writing a story, she starts a lot of them, but this one absolutely took my breath away. The way she describes everything, it's as though she's living it, and the ideas that come to her are ones which people can really relate to. There are just no words to describe how talented and creative she is. I really hope she finishes writing this novel. She talked about going to school for journalism so she can become an author, but she doesn't need to. She's the best writer I've ever come across.

Even when Rowenna is going through pain she has a way of brightening the world around her. Whenever I get down and no one else can bring me comfort I only need to spend a little while with Row and it changes my whole outlook. She'll start dancing, singing, or talk so enthusiastically about anything that I just forget my problems. I don't know how she does it. My mom has a way of comforting people and making them feel at ease. Rowenna just shines a bright light around everyone.

Thank you Wren, For being a great sister!!!

Fruit For All!! =D

My juice fast went very well. I feel so much different even after only one day. After that I had 6 ginormous honeydew melons, some the size of my head! I also had 4 pints of lovely grape tomatoes. I've been getting Dad to buy me a little more than usual, more variety, better fruit. Today I got green and red grapes, a huge cucumber, 5 mangoes, 1kg kiwi, 2 cantaloupes, 1 honeydew, a pint of heirloom tomatoes, and some organic bananas. I'm so lucky!!

I read my entire birthday book, "Fruitarianism The Path To Paradise". It was absolutely inspiring. I read a couple of quotes that I'd like to share for anyone who's doubting the fruit diet. First, a quote from Hilton Hotema's book "Long Life In Florida":

"Man was a purely frugivorous animal...despite that many years have passed since man forsook fruit as his food, no appreciative change has occured in his digestive apparatus. A careful study of human anatomy constrains all leading physiologists to affirm that man today, from the make-up of his body, is still a frugivorous animal."

Now a quote from Ranulph Fiennes in his book "Fit For Life":

"Fruit is the Panacea of good health...the human body system,from hands and teeth to digestive juices, was designed to cope superbly with fruit and not maet or even cereals...nothing fulfils our vitamin, mineral, water and toxin cleansing needs more effectively than fruit...Fruit is absolutely the best foodstuff for our health"

Onto another subject, we got some good news from a farm in BC who might be interested in us coming. They were a little iffy on our strange diet, but I'm very hopeful. Here's the ad for their farm:

Praxis Permaculture
We are restoring a 1940 homestead on 4.5 acres using the principles of Permaculture Design. Our small hobby farm includes a modest log house, new guest cabin, workshop studio, greenhouse, fenced areas for fruit/vegetable/ ornamental/mushroom cultivation & forested areas with native trees.
We are seeking enthusiastic people interested in organics as well as permaculture design - including water catchment & management, composting/ hugelkultur, small woodlot management, forest gardening, food production, plant propagation, rock work (stone walls, paths), etc.
Typical tasks would include: garden maintenance (planting, watering, weeding, fencing); plant propagation, pruning, seed saving, working with a professional permaculture forester (tree falling, chopping/chipping wood, stacking firewood), building rock paths, making trails in the woods, etc.
Check out our profile on Gardenjot (website listed in contact info) for many photos of our property and information about what we are doing.
Claire has a certificate in Permaculture Design and a small collection of related books that you may read.
Accommodation (double bed) in a brand new 100sq ft private cabin with stone patio, outdoor propane shower and new outhouse. An additional person could sleep in a tent with a foam mattress. Breakfast is prepared on your own (homemade breads & granola), lunch and dinner preparation and clean up is communal. Non-smoking household. LGBT welcome. Please bring biodegradable toiletries if possible.
Gabriola Island (size of Manhattan, population: 5000) is a 20-minute ferry ride from Nanaimo (on Vancouver Island). We can pick you up from, or drop you off at, the ferry. For more information on Gabriola check out: www.gabriolaisland.org We live within walking distance to the ocean and a beautiful provincial park. Lots of opportunities to enjoy nature: hiking, beach exploration, swimming, bird watching, mushroom identification - as well as island life: farmer's market, music and art events, craft shows etc.
Region:
Gabriola Island, BC
Your home is:
Non-Smoking
The meals you prepare are:
vegetarian, non-vegetarian
Family members in your home:
2 women
Animals/pets living in your home:
2 friendly dogs (hypo-allergenic Standard Poodles)
How many years hosting?: 0

We also got a reply from a raw food teacher who sounds like she's very interested in us coming later in the spring. So all good news here!!

Divine Day!

The first page of my vision book

Tomorrow I'm having a day all to myself, to relax and rejuvenate since I've been stressing way too much lately. I'm going to do a juice fast(I've got loads of honeydew melons and oranges that need to be eaten, or drank=D), listen to music, do yoga, paint and read my new library books. I've been going through a rough emotional time due to my negative feelings about painting. I was so happy to sell my first piece, but things went downhill after that. I started to hate art. I didn't like the pressure of feeling like I had to create things that other people would like, or even see, and the idea of making money(something I hate) corrupted my simple love of art. In the library today a book came to me through some divine force, that's the only way I can explain it. I was just browsing and it caught my eye. I borrowed it without even reading the back to see what it was about. When I got home I realized it was exactly what I was looking for. I just started it, but already I feel at peace. It's called "Painting From The Source- Awakening the Artist's Soul in Everyone" and this is what the back reads:

"Imagine yourself painting with no hesitations, no conflicts. Your brush dips into pots of vibrantly colored paint; inner inspiration guides your hand into lines and shapes that find their perfect places on the paper...
Welcome! I'm Aviva Gold, your guide to the magic source. As children, all of us lived and painted intuitively. And as adults we can re-create the boundless joy of unselfconscious art by setting aside intellectual critique and self-doubt and reconnecting with the source. Remember standing at an easel as a child and painting in a trancelike state of wonder? Somewhere alone the line this freedom gets trained out of us, and we are either categorized as artists or not.
Every human being is an artist. In Bali, one word means both "human" and "artist". "

So tomorrow I will definitely be reading more of this amazing books. I already feel like it will not only change more my perspective on art, but on my whole way of seeing life and the world. My book by Anne Osbourne also came today, and Dad will be dropping it off tomorrow. It's called "Fruitarianism:The path to Paradise". I'm so excited to finally read it.
As far as my whole BC adventure, I did get a reply back from a farm/retreat there, and it might work out. I'm also thinking about staying there for the summer and doing fruit picking to save up some money for travelling to a warm climate next winter.
Oh, one more thing, today I got some organic mangoes for half price, my very first organic ones, and eating them was an amazing experience! They were so sweet, and flavorful, I felt like I was floating the whole time I was eating them!

Back in the day.....

Aww, my beautiful long hair. I will have it again someday
Me and my trusty bike

Me on a gate in the hay field

My model pose, haha, when I was 14

Me and my friend Stacey with my dad's horse, Ilsa

I was just going through some old pictures from when we lived on our beautiful farm. It was summertime and Rowenna and I were glowing with health from running through the fields and being in the fresh air all day every day. I miss it so much, but I will have it again someday. Of course, it will be a little different. I will be somewhere where it's warm all year, and there will be fruit growing all around me. I won't need to rely on a job or anything else. I'll be free. I'm sure envisioning these things will help me to manifest them. Someone close to me told me I have no future and I'll end up a bum on the street someday, just because I'm not going after a career and lifestyle like everyone else. I don't believe that we should work and work every day, saving up for when we won't need anything at all. I'm told I'm immature for believing good things will come to me, but I think faith is worth more than all the money in the world. I'm happy to live the unknown.

My future is still completely unknown at this point. WWOOF Canada hasn't inspired us at all yet. British Columbia is still a possibility since it's warmer there, but we haven't found a host yet. It's really hard to find a place that sounds good and will supply tons of raw, fresh fruit. Nearly impossible actually. Veganism is one thing, but trying to convince people you're not crazy when they hear you're a fruitarian, is definitely another. Oh well, I'm sure we'll figure out something amazing.....it just takes time.

I SOLD MY FIRST PAINTING!!!!!

"Sisters", the painting I sold today for $150!!


Ok, first of all, we didn't make it to Ontario, but I'll get to that after. I was feeling kind of down today, then I checked my email and got a message from etsy.com( a site for artists who want to sell their stuff) and I got a sale to a lady in Portugal!!! I only had one painting on there for about a month, and I figured it wouldn't sell because there are so many amazing artists on there, and it would take a lot of searching to even find mine. I was totally shocked, and now I'm soooo happy=D I need to do more painting! It will fill my days now :)

Ok, why we're not in Ontario. First, the storm forced us to reschedule our train trip. When we did we got another vague letter from the owners of the farm. We weren't feeling good about it so decided to cancel. It's unfortunate that this keeps happening, but I think it's because something even better is in store for us. Today my Dad helped me buy a membership to WWOOF Canada since it looks like we might be stuck here for a while. I haven't really searched yet, but hopefully we'll find a perfect farm.