For Those Who Can Feel The Shift Taking Place

I've been back in Hawaii for about a week. As of my last post I was preparing for my trip to Mexico. Last minute it just didn't feel right, so I booked a flight back to the Big Island. Funny, I can't seem to stay away for long. This is my third time here, and since the first time I've never been gone for more than 5 months. It calls me back so strongly. This time I honestly thought I was completely insane, just booking a flight and coming back here without thinking it through at all, but the minute I got off the plane I knew it was right. The warm, humid, tropical breeze felt so welcoming. I'm connected to this island and it will always be my home. It hasn't been without struggles though. Coming back here with no plans, or even a place to live was really stressful, but within a few days I had found myself a room near downtown Hilo. I've spent pretty much all my money getting here and paying rent, but for now at least, I am completely taken care of.

It feels like EVERYTHING in life is coming to the surface, like there is an energetic chaos going on throughout the entire planet. It's hard to explain and I don't even understand it, but its very intense, and I can feel it breaking. Big changes are taking place right now. I have found myself lost in this chaos for some months now, but it's getting a lot stronger. It's very hard to ground myself or even focus on what I'm in the process of manifesting.

You can even see this change in me. The photo on the left is before I left for Hawaii last winter, almost a year ago. I was trying so hard to remain composed, to hold the whole world together, to deny the chaos, and it was taking a toll on me. The photo on the right was taken today, and I'm feeling more in the flow with the chaos around me(even my hair has become a reflection of the way of the world, hehe). It is coming on so fast though, rushing through me with such intensity. I feel lost and afraid much of the time, but in the moments where I embrace this crazy energy, I feel more grounded than ever.

I feel so blessed to be back on my island home! There is no place I'd rather be for this amazing shift which is taking place. I think I'm on an energy vortex because I feel it all so much more strongly here. A big part of why I left here in the summer was because I felt like I wasn't ready to face everything that is happening in the universe. This island is not a place to escape your troubles. No, this is where it all collides, and you have two choices: 1)Learn to FLOW, or 2) Suffer in resistance. There is strong magic at work on this island, and people are drawn here for a reason.

Being in Hilo, I am really missing the jungle. I thought being here would be better for getting to the market for fruit and maybe getting a job, but I hope to make my way back to Kapoho soon, or at least somewhere near there. I'm thinking about trying WWOOFing. I'd get much needed and desired practice with organic gardening, and I wouldn't need to worry about making money to pay rent. Really feeling a strong desire to avoid having a constricting job. I tend to feel caged very easily, so I do best living in a quiet, natural place, mostly alone(or with close family/tribe) with nowhere I need to be and with nothing I need to do. The more I follow my instincts, the more I feel that is the way of life humans were meant to live, and will need to go back to if we wish to remain sane. It is especially apparent in the city how lost most of us are. We're living these highly constricting lives, trying to hold everything together, and it is killing us. People are losing their light and becoming grey. And they think that they just need to keep working, try harder, acquire more.So many people are struggling so much right now, including myself. I think of it like this: This is the birth of the new earth, the death of the old ways, and just as in our individual lives, birth and death can go two ways. With resistance, both can be very painful, and drawn out, lasting for much longer than if we let go. But if we are able to take the leap of faith, allowing our body, mind and soul to flow, it will all happen beautifully, the energy flowing through us ecstatically, the dance of the universe. This struggle and suffering is our gift though, because the stronger it gets, the more clearly we will see that we have a choice to make. We're not victims.

Imagine if you could just let yourself flow. What would it look like? We have limitless potential, but we're lost in a lie, believing that we are caged, that we need to live meaningless lives to get where we want to go. It feels so scary, even counter-intuitive, to just make a leap of faith into our wildest dreams, so for the most part we forget about what we really want, compromising, settling for a life like people around us are living. If you look around, you will see that most people are living the same life, one with little inspiration in it. Sit for a minute right now and think about(or write down, this really helps) what you really want in your life. Don't put restrictions on yourself. Imagine that you can have, do or be anything. What does your dream life look like? Think about all the little details. What makes this life so beautiful? Are you in a magical place? Are you at peace there? What does that peace feel like? This is all you need to do right now. You can stop trying, stop worrying about the fact that you're not living a perfect life right now. Just focus on that feeling of inspiration that you feel while thinking about your limitless potential. That is who you are.

I know so many people are afraid right now. I can see it in their eyes. Things are falling apart and with the attachment we all have to the circumstances around us, we feel like we're falling apart too. But you're going to be ok. Don't be afraid to fall apart. CRY. Be real. It's ok to feel. That's all I can say right now. Give someone a hug if you can. Try to embrace as many people and other beings as you can. It's all going to come down to Love.